MetaBatty

Super #1 Football Sports Program Naming Style!

OK, so I know that NFL football is now on (almost) every major network in America, and even one or two minor/cable networks. Tonight there were not one, but TWO Monday Night Football Games for our national viewing pleasure.  Add that to a Thursday night game last week, and all the games on Sunday, and I have to guess that all wives, girlfriends, and partners NOT interested in football must be feeling SEVERELY neglected right about now.

But that's not what I want to talk about.  What I want to talk about is the complete lack of creativity on behalf of network execs at NBC, who finally got football back on their airwaves after, what, 8 years?  In my mind that punishment wasn't severe enough for their terrible coverage back in the 90s. They actually would NOT show the score throughout the duration of the game.  Their commentators were awful.  And they were just generally behind the times in light of constant tweaks and innovations from the competition at Fox and ABC.

I thought NBC might be "ready for some football" again, until I saw the horrible, unoriginal, jingoistic and perhaps Japanese-translated-to-English name of their new Sunday night pre-game program (the hour-long show everyone watches BEFORE the four-hour football game, to get current on players, stats, rumors, gossip, home tours, the latest song from road-whore "Pink," etc).

That title? "Football Night in America."

I mean, I know it is hard when your competition already has the tour de force, Hemmingway-esque title of "Sunday Night Football" and "Fox NFL Sunday," but, really, couldn't they have thought of something better than what they are now called?

"Football Night in America"

Seriously?  I mean, really?  Is that the best NBC could do?

"Football Night in America."

That reminds me of the infamous Saturday Night Live fake ad for "Happy Fun Ball." Or something you might see on a Chinese take-out menu: "Happy Family Dinner #1." Or a karaoke bar in Tokyo: "Sing Proudly in the Box." (yes, I made up the last one)

But you get my point.  Geeeeez, this is a really bad name. I mean, they have Bob Costas, the living legend of sports commentary. Not to mention my favorite caller of all time, Al Michaels, paired once again with John "Now Here's a Guy" Madden, calling the actual game.  That's the best commentary line up out there, but they lead in to it all with this terrible name.

"Football Night in America"

It's not too early to change the name, but that might be the least of their problems, if you believe the New York Times.

Dick Ebersol, head of NBC Sports (and the guy who kept SNL alive back in the early 80s), has missed his mark on this one, for the first time in a loonnnng time.  The guy is a sports progamming genius.  How he came up with this name, or at least gave it the green light, is beyond me. Dick - lock it up!

Go Patriots

Against all logic and chance, the George Mason University Patriots are in the Elite Eight of the 2006 NCAA tournament. I didn't pick them to go past the first round but, here they are, about to face off today with the dominating Univeristy of Connecticut - the team I picked to win it all this year.  Brackets be damned, I am pulling for the first college I ever attended to beat UConn today.  A slim chance, but they have proved everybody else wrong so far, so why stop now?  Go Patriots.

Better Luck Next Time

I am not much of a sports guy, but this is important.  Just wanted to make sure you knew the following:

In a tribute to their legacy of inconsistency, the Maryland Terrapins basketball team ended their most inconsistent season in more than a decade with a bang - they were not invited to the NCAA tournament for the first time since 1993.

We are talking about the 2002 NCAA national champions here.  The team that handed powerhouse Duke its longest losing streak to one team, thanks to two consecutive victories this season.  The team that somehow lost to Clemson in every meeting this year.  CLEMSON.

This is probably a good gut check for coach Gary Williams.  In my opinion, he lets his players get out of control on the court, play as individuals and not as a team, and can rarely get them to perform in the clutch. He's on cruise control these days, and this will make him put his foot back on the pedal and drive this team back to elite status next year.  Just my opinion there.

At least they get to play another game or three, as they were invited to the NIT, the sympathy party for teams that weren't good enough or have too easy a schedule to get an invite to the big show.  The legendary Terps will be playing - are you ready for this? - Oral Roberts.  In case you are not familiar with ORU, check out their mission statement. Wow, they have God on their side.  For real.

Pray for one more Terp victory.